译知识 | 商务应用文的译写规则

本文转载自：译聚网

在我国很多对外的商务应用文如产品操作指南和使用说明书等都是先用中文撰写，然后再由翻译人员译为英文。由于译者对英语应用文体的语言特点缺乏了解，仅凭借他们的英语语言功底把中文材料译成英文,结果是不少译文尽管很少语法错误和拼写错误，其译文因不符合商务英语应用文的文体特点，不是说英语的人所习用的格式，因而难以为西方读者所理解和接受。下面让我们来看一则地道的英文存包使用说明是如何写的：

Public Lock

To use

1) Open the door.

2) Place articles inside.

3) Insert quarter (It will be returned).

4) Turn and remove key.

To remove contents

1) Insert key and turn.

2) Open the door.

3) Quarter returns in slot.

从词汇上看，原文的“存”、“取”由译文1的“deposit”、“ withdrawal”改为译文2切合英语习惯用法的“ to use”与“ to remove contents”。从总体上看, 修改后的译文用词简洁，句子凝练，是简单易懂的口语体，便于人们操作使用。

要译好商务应用文，译者“应尽可能地参考相关文件的英语原文，参照它们的内容、格式和文字来进行写作和翻译”。翻译时要中撰照‘入乡随俗’的原则，用英语中‘约定俗成’的语言和形式来进行创造性的翻译”。只有遵循“入乡随俗”翻译原则译出的对外宣传材料才能为讲英语的读者所喜闻乐见，达到翻译的目的。林克难根据中国译者的实际情况明确提出了商务应用文应遵循“看、译、写”的翻译原则：“看”指的是在翻译某类应用文前，译者通过阅读相关的材料来熟悉该类应用文体的格式。“译”指的是译者在“看”的基础上，动笔翻译时，既可以采用英文中一些现成的词组或句子，也可以套用它们的格式。至于“写” ，林先生指的似乎是另外一种翻译策略：即翻译发起人将需要翻译的主要内容告诉译者，让译者充分发挥自己的主动作用，根据英语中相关的应用文体措辞和格式“改写”原文，从而译出符合说英语的人所能接受的“译文”来。其实，商务应用文的翻译完全可以遵循“译写”原则。因为即使翻译发起人没有明确交代给译者应该怎么做，他/她肯定有明确的翻译目的，即向说英语的人介绍或宣传自己的产品或发布信息等。要使译文达到翻译的目的，起到更好的宣传效果，译者应该也必须采用商务应用文体“习惯的语言表达方式”，并遵循英语国家通用的规范格式。比如下面这则项目招商通告即使没有翻译发起人的请求，其译文的处理也是参照英语国家类似的项目招商通告，对原文内容进行了重新组织才译成英文的。

原文：

重庆南部新城开发建设征集策划运作单位

重庆主城区南部新城，面积33平方公里，重庆李家沱和马桑溪两座长江大桥跨越其间，是商家置业的黄金口岸。为实现国家西部大开发战略，我们计划进行全面开发建设。诚征"新城"策划 (规划)运作单位,有意者请与重庆市巴南区西部办联系。

联系人：

联系电话：

译文：

REQUEST FOR PROPORSALS FOR DEVELOPMENT PLANS The“New Town”Project of Chongqing

The Office of the Development of the Western Regions in Banan District, Chongqing City, invites qualified urban planners to submit proposals to design and plan the full-scale development of the New Town in the southern section of the city proper. The site of the project, with a total area of 33 square kilometers，is a spectacular setting strategically located, embracing the two Yangzi River bridges at lijiatuo and Masangxi. It is a port promising unrivaled opportunities for commercial and real estate investments. The project is part of the effort to implement the national program for the development of the western regions of the country. A decision has therefore been made to carry out a full-scale development of the “ New Town”precinct，which calls for competitive proposals of development plans. Interested parties are advised to apply to the Office of Banan District for the Development of the Western Regions.

Contact Persons ；

Phone ：

Fax：

在商用文的翻译中，由于大多数原文所针对的读者对象是中国读者，其中有些说法直接翻译很难让外国人看懂。例如，在介绍某市景点的一本旅游画册中，有这么一段中英文对照：

原文：

市内外有名胜古迹300多处，市中心有赵武灵王操演兵马和观赏歌舞的武灵丛台，市郊有国家重点文物保护单位——赵王城遗址，城北有明代所建“蓬莱仙境”般的黄粱梦吕仙祠，市西南有可与龙门、敦煌媲美始凿于北齐的响堂山石窟。[这里]又是典故之城……黄粱美梦、毛遂自荐、负荆请罪、完璧归赵等众多成语典故，脍炙人口，给人启迪。

译文：

There are over 300 scenic spots and historical sites inside and outside the city. In the civic center stands the Wuling Congtai Terrace, where the King Wuling drilled warriors and enjoyed singing and dancing performances；in the outskirts remains the ruined City of the State of Zhao，the monument specially protected by the state，in the north lies the fairy-land-like Golden Millet Dream Temple built in the Song Dynasty; in the southwest lies the Xiang Tang Caves Temple built in the Bei Qi period，which is thought to be as famous as Longman and Dunhuang. Being a town of allusions, XXXX certainly has numerous greatly inspired allusions, such as. . . “ Golden Millet dream ( pipe Dream)”，“Mao Sui Recommending Himself (Volunteering one's services) ”，“Bearing the rod for Punishment”，“Returning the Jade Intact to Zhao”，ect.，which are widely loved and quoted by people.

读到这段充满了陌生的中国地名、人名、朝代名和典故的文字，一般外国人只能望“文”兴叹，将之拋掷一边了。其实，在这种情况下，译者最明智的选择，是根据原作的意图以及译文读者的需要，对原稿进行译前编辑（当然，在做这项工作之前，译者有必要把自己的处理手段告诉翻译发起人，征得对方的同意）：即对中文原稿中不适合译文读者需求的内容可以进行删节、增添（补充相关的文化背景知识)，或按照译文读者的审美习惯进行改写，对原稿本身存在的混乱的逻辑思路也可以加以纠正。

翻译商务应用文，译者有时还可以根据他/她所熟知的商务应用文的格式对原稿进行重新设计和编排，以使自己的译文能够更好地为读者所接受。比如，无论是汉语请柬还是英语请柬，一般都沿用多年来一直使用的固定格式。这种格式由于是在长期使用中定了型的，为人们所一致公认和接受，给人一种郑重其事的印象，所以，一般都不轻易加以改动。同样，翻译请柬时，译者更应采用译入语国家的读者所习惯的格式。例如：

The Deputy Prime Minister of Australia

and Minister for Overseas Trade

Dr J. F. Cairns

requests the pleasure of your company

at a Banquet

on Friday, 11 October, 1994

from 12. 30 to 1. 30 p. m.

in Hall Three of the Beijing Exhibition Center

to mark the opening of the Australian Exhibition

R. S. V. P.

Tel：

谨订于1994年10月11日（星期五）12时半至下午1时半假座北京展览馆3号大厅举行宴会，庆祝澳大利亚展览会开幕。

敬请光临

澳大利亚副总理兼海外贸易部长

J . F•凯恩斯博士

(请赐复;电话：）

再如，下面这则招标通告的原译文虽然"忠实"于原文，但不符合英文的表达习惯和格式，因而难以使读者接受。改译则根据英语招标通告的文体特点和格式进行了适当地“改写”，使译文所针对的读者能够充分了解该通告的内容。

原文：

中国技术进出口总公司

招标通告编号198147

经中华人民共和国对外经济贸易部和日本海外经济协力基金会开发南宁至昆明铁路工程贷款协议授权,中国技术进出口总公司，利用该项贷款，为购买上述工程项目所需下列设备进行国际竞争性密封招标。

在合格货源国组建并注册的制造商和/或商贸公司（合格货源国系指上述贷款协议规定的世界上任何国家和地区），若有意参加，请于1998年9月21日至23日上午9时至11时(北京时间)与中国技术进出口总公司三部联系，购买资质与招标文件,每套人民币2 340元，售款不退还。定于1998年10月28日开标。

设备清单(略）

中国技术进出口总公司三部

地址：中国北京西三环北路21号久凌大厦

原译文：

China National Technical Import & Export Corporation

(CNTIC)

Invitation for Bid- No. CNTIC -198147

In accordance with the Loan Agreement concluded between the Ministry of Foreign Trade and Economic Cooperation of the People's Republic of China and the Overseas Economic Cooperation Fund of Japan for Nanning-Kunming Railway Project ( P43 ) , China National Technical Import & Export Corporation ( CNTIC ) is authorized to purchase the equipment listed below for the above-mentioned project by way of International Competitive Bidding (ICB ). All the purchases shall be financed with the proceeds of the Loan.

We hereby invite sealed bids from manufacturers and/or trading companies organized by and registered in and controlled by eligible source countries According to the stipulations of the Loan Agreement，the eligible source countries refer to all regions and countries of the world.

Interested manufacturers and/ or trading companies are kindly requested to contact the Third Division of CNTIC for obtaining the qualification and bidding documents between 9:00 and 11 ：00 am (Beijing) from September 21 to 23, 1998 upon non-refimdable payment of RMB 2,340 for all the following equipment in one book. The bid will be evened on October 28,1998.

List of Equipment

(omitted )

The Third Division, China National Technical Import & Export Corporation

Address ：Jiuling Building，21 Xisanhuan Beilu，Beijing, China

改译文：

China National Technology Import & Export Corporation

(CNTIC)

Call for Tenders/Invitation for Bids No. CNTIC-198147

In accordance with the Loan Agreement concluded between the Ministry of Foreign Trade and Economic Cooperation of the People's Republic of China and the Overseas Economic Cooperation Fund of Japan for Nanning-Kunming Railway Project ( P43)，China National Technology Import & Export Corporation (CNTIC) is authorized to purchase through international tendering/International Competitive Bidding (ICB) the equipment listed below. All the purchases shall be financed through the loan arrangement mentioned above.

List of Equipment (omitted)

Sealed lenders/bids are invited from tenderers/bidders-manufacturers and/or trading companies organized by and registered in and controlled by eligible source countries，which refers to all countries and regions of the world according to the stipulations of the Loan Agreement.

General terms and conditions together with qualification requirements are set out in a book which is obtainable from the Third Division of CNTIC between 9:00 and 11 ：00 am (Beijing) from September 21 to 23, 1998 against non-refundable payment of RMB ¥2,340.

All tenders/bids are to be validly received by the Third Division, China National Technology Import & Export Corporation before 1200 hours on the specified opening date at the address below. Tenders/bids will be opened on October 28,1998.

Any offer submitted after the closing date of the tender/bid，or which does not comply with the above terms, will not be accepted.

The Third Division，China National Technology Import & Export Corporation

Address ：Jiuling Building, 21 Xisanhuanbeilu, Beijing, China

综上所述，商务应用文的翻译要想达到好的效果，就必须遵循商务英语应用文的格式和表达习惯。这就要求译者系统地学习此类英语文体的知识，研究它们的语言特点和格式,争取用说英语的人所喜闻乐见的表达方式来翻译，从而使商务应用文的翻译真正做到与国际接轨。

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